That was the question I overheard the other day while watching my kids play at the park. A cute little girl, about 4 or 5 years old, was getting pushed on the swings by her dad. I was sitting on a nearby bench and I couldn't help but hear her as she babbled away on the swing.
Of course, my ears always prick up at the word "peanuts" so I waited to her what Dad would say. He said "Well, yes I guess they are." I, and many of you, would disagree, because from our perspective it would be nice if they weren't thought of as kid "go-to" food. However, nutrionally speaking, peanuts are a good source of protein (though, I would argue, not nearly as great as they're cracked up to be. Fat, cholesterol, etc.)
So then, the little girl said "Well, I had my friend over today for lunch. She's allergic to peanuts. She almost ate a piece of peanut popcorn (I'm guessing a snack w/peanuts or peanut oil) and her mom got her away from it just in time."
They then carried on with their conversation and it shifted quickly to other topics. I thought it was so interesting, though! Obviously, this young girl was confused and concerned for her friend. If peanuts are so "good for you," why does her friend have to avoid them and carry and EpiPen? Why does her friend's mom have to do a quick "food interception" at a lunch and play date? (How many of you have had to run interference before a very young child went for a seemingly harmless food it turns out they can't have?)
I felt for this other mother--I don't even know her, but I know what she's going through. And how many other mothers had to perform a "food allergy rescue" that day or just stress about a simple lunch date with their kids? Too many--but they're not alone, as we know all too well.
Based on this young girl as well as the kids my daughter meets at school, it seems to me that more and more young children accept peanut allergies with aplomb. It's the adults (especially the "message board haters" ) that seem to have a bigger problem with it.
Acceptance of this condition will take years for our generation, if it comes at all. However, this young girl gave me a glimmer of hope, that future generations will just accept that a friend or acquaintance has to avoid certain foods and then go about their business.
Wouldn't that be great?
Monday, September 29, 2008
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Kids "Owning" Their Food Allergies
Recently, my daughter and I had a discusion that made me realize how much she is growing up -- and how that will affect how she feels about her nut allergy. As she gets older, she wants less input from me on how to manage her activities (well, she is officially a "tween") and that spilled over into a discussion about the FAAN walk coming up in Chicago this weekend.
We've never been to this walk. Usually, it falls on my wedding anniversary, and we've had plans that interfered with us participating. This year, though, the weekend worked for us. A few weeks ago, I asked my daughter if she'd like to attend.
I was surprised by the vehemence of her response, which was a resounding NO. When I asked her why not, all the kids there would have food allergies and she'd feel supported, she had an interesting take on it.
She told me that joining an event revolving around food allergies would only emphasize to her that she's "different." She told me that she just wants to be thought of as a normal kid, not as a kid having a food allergy.
She also told me that I don't understand what it's like to have to worry about food at a friend's house, or when we go out to eat. She said she knows about the "secret" candy stash I keep on a high kitchen shelf and that she feels bad she can't have something that I can. (Busted.)
Basically, she told me that she appreciates my support but that she has to handle the food allergy thing as she feels best.
It was an eye-opener to me and I wonder if some of you have heard similar things from older kids with food allergies. My daughter is right: this is her condition and I need to respect her feelings about it. I don't blame her for wanting to feel like a "normal" kid. Even though I've assured her that she is a "normal" kid, anything little thing that makes a kid feel different is a very big deal to them. All of us can remember back to grade school and middle school, when "fitting in" was about the highest calling you could have.
It tugged at my heart, to be sure, when I thought about how right she was. She needs to "own" her own allergy. And the last thing I want to do is force her to participate in something that doesn't feel right to her, even if it is a very good cause. She's young enough not to grasp the ways a walk like this can help her and kids like her, and just old enough to be sensitive about it. Maybe someday her views will change as her understanding grows.
Now, she knows about this blog and she said it's OK with her. (She thinks it makes her "famous.") Still, I will be respectful of her here, too.
So, this year I will donate to the FAAN Walk for a Cure, but I won't walk with my daughter. Maybe we'll be there next year, maybe not. Either way, it will be her choice and I'll be where I always try to be: on her side.
We've never been to this walk. Usually, it falls on my wedding anniversary, and we've had plans that interfered with us participating. This year, though, the weekend worked for us. A few weeks ago, I asked my daughter if she'd like to attend.
I was surprised by the vehemence of her response, which was a resounding NO. When I asked her why not, all the kids there would have food allergies and she'd feel supported, she had an interesting take on it.
She told me that joining an event revolving around food allergies would only emphasize to her that she's "different." She told me that she just wants to be thought of as a normal kid, not as a kid having a food allergy.
She also told me that I don't understand what it's like to have to worry about food at a friend's house, or when we go out to eat. She said she knows about the "secret" candy stash I keep on a high kitchen shelf and that she feels bad she can't have something that I can. (Busted.)
Basically, she told me that she appreciates my support but that she has to handle the food allergy thing as she feels best.
It was an eye-opener to me and I wonder if some of you have heard similar things from older kids with food allergies. My daughter is right: this is her condition and I need to respect her feelings about it. I don't blame her for wanting to feel like a "normal" kid. Even though I've assured her that she is a "normal" kid, anything little thing that makes a kid feel different is a very big deal to them. All of us can remember back to grade school and middle school, when "fitting in" was about the highest calling you could have.
It tugged at my heart, to be sure, when I thought about how right she was. She needs to "own" her own allergy. And the last thing I want to do is force her to participate in something that doesn't feel right to her, even if it is a very good cause. She's young enough not to grasp the ways a walk like this can help her and kids like her, and just old enough to be sensitive about it. Maybe someday her views will change as her understanding grows.
Now, she knows about this blog and she said it's OK with her. (She thinks it makes her "famous.") Still, I will be respectful of her here, too.
So, this year I will donate to the FAAN Walk for a Cure, but I won't walk with my daughter. Maybe we'll be there next year, maybe not. Either way, it will be her choice and I'll be where I always try to be: on her side.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
The Recent Buzz on Food Allergy Labeling and My "Marketplace" Mention
In tandem with the FDA allergy labeling discussion going on today, NPR's "Marketplace" show did an item on food allergies and food labeling last night. And guess what--my blog got a mention! In July I wrote a post called "Is It Me, Or Are Allergy Labels Getting Way Wackier??" They summarized this post in the story. Follow this link to read/listen to the story on NPR. It felt great to have my blog mentioned right next to a quote from one of my food allergy heroes, Anne Munoz-Furlong, founder of FAAN.
It's always nice for your blog to be given a "shout-out" in the media, but the most important thing about this story is that it illustrates how dire the need is for consistent food labeling. The Marketplace story also brought up the issue that many of us have discussed lately and that is the fact that manufacturers don't want to spend money to have consistent food labels, and so they are just labeling everything "may contain the top 8 allergens." I know that so many companies are struggling right now and I sympathize, but there has to be a better way.
There's been a lot of buzz about food labels lately and I've got another great article on this topic for you to check out. This month's Chicago Parent magazine features a story called "Mom Takes on Food Industry" about one mother's efforts to make food manufacturers more aware about their labeling practices after her food-allergic son got very ill after eating a mislabeled food item.
I'm very interested to see what the FDA has to say today. Stay tuned!
It's always nice for your blog to be given a "shout-out" in the media, but the most important thing about this story is that it illustrates how dire the need is for consistent food labeling. The Marketplace story also brought up the issue that many of us have discussed lately and that is the fact that manufacturers don't want to spend money to have consistent food labels, and so they are just labeling everything "may contain the top 8 allergens." I know that so many companies are struggling right now and I sympathize, but there has to be a better way.
There's been a lot of buzz about food labels lately and I've got another great article on this topic for you to check out. This month's Chicago Parent magazine features a story called "Mom Takes on Food Industry" about one mother's efforts to make food manufacturers more aware about their labeling practices after her food-allergic son got very ill after eating a mislabeled food item.
I'm very interested to see what the FDA has to say today. Stay tuned!
Friday, September 12, 2008
Poll Results--What Is Your Biggest "Nut-Free Parent Challenge?"
Thanks to everyone who participated in my poll, "What's Your Biggest Challenge as a Nut-Free Parent?"
Here's what you had to say:
According to the numbers, the most difficult challenge was "educating others about your child's food allergy." 33% of you voted for this one.
Coming in second was "Restaurants" (23%) followed by "School"(19%) and then, unfortunately, "Family members and friends who don't get it" (14%). "Travel" weighed in at 9%.
Nobody voted for "Child care" or "Play dates" which leads me to believe that many of the respondents are the parents of very young kids. When our kids are preschool age or younger, we have a much bigger hand in controlling their environments. And most preschools these days seem to be nut-free. It seems that once we get out of that realm is when we feel challenged.
I'm sorry to hear that family members, especially, aren't "getting it." The way to deal with that is by gently educating them and of course, not leaving our children with them (alone) until we're sure they do get it. I would hope that grandparents and close family members can be reasoned with on this issue--what have some of you done to accomplish this?
As far as "educating others" what do you think is the best way to do this? Personally, I'd love to give everybody a short handbook on nut allergies and ask them to read it. I'd recommend that we all make use of the brochures we find at our allergists' offices and take one home for grandma, grandpa, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends. Referring our family and friends to relevant news articles and yes, even blogs like this one, may also help.
The FAAN website is also a good place to refer people--I've had good success with that one.
Again, thanks for your participation. I'll have another poll up soon. It's helpful to see the areas in which we need the most support!
Here's what you had to say:
According to the numbers, the most difficult challenge was "educating others about your child's food allergy." 33% of you voted for this one.
Coming in second was "Restaurants" (23%) followed by "School"(19%) and then, unfortunately, "Family members and friends who don't get it" (14%). "Travel" weighed in at 9%.
Nobody voted for "Child care" or "Play dates" which leads me to believe that many of the respondents are the parents of very young kids. When our kids are preschool age or younger, we have a much bigger hand in controlling their environments. And most preschools these days seem to be nut-free. It seems that once we get out of that realm is when we feel challenged.
I'm sorry to hear that family members, especially, aren't "getting it." The way to deal with that is by gently educating them and of course, not leaving our children with them (alone) until we're sure they do get it. I would hope that grandparents and close family members can be reasoned with on this issue--what have some of you done to accomplish this?
As far as "educating others" what do you think is the best way to do this? Personally, I'd love to give everybody a short handbook on nut allergies and ask them to read it. I'd recommend that we all make use of the brochures we find at our allergists' offices and take one home for grandma, grandpa, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends. Referring our family and friends to relevant news articles and yes, even blogs like this one, may also help.
The FAAN website is also a good place to refer people--I've had good success with that one.
Again, thanks for your participation. I'll have another poll up soon. It's helpful to see the areas in which we need the most support!
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
How's School So Far??
Many of us have had school in session for at least a week now and I am curious to see how things have been going. Also, I've been getting several e-mails and posts regarding school issues. It seems that this is the big thing on all of our minds right now! (Of course, besides our increasingly "interesting" political landscape, but that's a whole 'nother blog!) :)
As many of you know, my kids started a new school this year and I had a LOT of anxiety about how the whole nut allergy thing would be handled. I know that my daughter was anxious about how the other kids would regard her allergies.
I'm happy to report that so far, so good. Of course, it's early yet but I feel pretty good about the school is handling things. For example, when I needed to change my daughter's food allergy emergency plan a bit, they responded positively and quickly. Before school even began, I was asked to meet with all of the 3rd grade staff to discuss my daughter's allergies. Her classmates have been great, too. All the girls like her "fashionable" pink-and-red allergy ID bracelet, which certainly helped her get over her self-consciousness about wearing it!
We've only been in school for two weeks, but already we've been hit with a lot of decisions and issues related to food allergies (and yes, I'm the 3rd grade Treats Mom again this year!), so I'm sure some of you have some stories to share. Has anything unusual cropped up for you? How are you handling it?
And let's not forget the teachers. They're a big part of our food allergy "team" and I hope we all are having a positive experience working with them. Some of them are old pros at the allergy thing and some are learning for the first time, but they all care about kids and they can be some of our best allies at school.
As many of you know, my kids started a new school this year and I had a LOT of anxiety about how the whole nut allergy thing would be handled. I know that my daughter was anxious about how the other kids would regard her allergies.
I'm happy to report that so far, so good. Of course, it's early yet but I feel pretty good about the school is handling things. For example, when I needed to change my daughter's food allergy emergency plan a bit, they responded positively and quickly. Before school even began, I was asked to meet with all of the 3rd grade staff to discuss my daughter's allergies. Her classmates have been great, too. All the girls like her "fashionable" pink-and-red allergy ID bracelet, which certainly helped her get over her self-consciousness about wearing it!
We've only been in school for two weeks, but already we've been hit with a lot of decisions and issues related to food allergies (and yes, I'm the 3rd grade Treats Mom again this year!), so I'm sure some of you have some stories to share. Has anything unusual cropped up for you? How are you handling it?
And let's not forget the teachers. They're a big part of our food allergy "team" and I hope we all are having a positive experience working with them. Some of them are old pros at the allergy thing and some are learning for the first time, but they all care about kids and they can be some of our best allies at school.