Food Allergy and School: Love for the Peanut-Free Table

Nut-free or not nut-free...table. That is the question facing

many school-aged kids with allergies.

 

If your school-aged child is severely allergic to peanuts, tree nuts, or both, you've probably been offered (or maybe you've asked for) a nut-free or peanut-free lunch table. Our current school district recently went one step further to offer an "allergy-free table" that addresses multiple food allergies. Since these tables are frequently part of a child's 504 plan or Individual Health Plan, they are likely to continue cropping up at an increasing number of schools.

In general, though, it's usually a peanut or nut-free table being talked about at school. If your school is offering you this option, that is a sign that they are taking allergies seriously which is a very good thing. Unfortunately, the peanut-free table has gotten a bit of a stigma. Some of the common objections: nobody wants to sit there, it's punishment for having allergies, kids are isolated and alone, it's not the "real world" way of doing things, etc.

Please believe: I do understand why some of us might have that perspective, but as a parent whose child has used and benefited from a nut-free table, I want to reassure parents that it doesn't have to be that way. Especially in the younger grades, when kids are not as able to manage their own allergies, a nut-free table can provide a safe place to eat during the school day. For the "real world" objectors, I also am a strong proponent of helping kids live in the real world. But the fact is, in the real world, they can get up and move if allergens are presenting a problem for them. Not so in most schools with strict seating and behavior policies.

In particular, I want us to remember why these tables are being offered in the first place: to provide allergic kids with a clean, allergen-free place to enjoy their midday meal that reduces the risk of exposing them to a potentially dangerous allergic reaction.

From a social point of view, the table should be open to non-allergic kids who have brought an allergy-friendly lunch. Encourage your child to ask his or her friends to join them. Seriously, most kids are so used to the "free-from table" concept that they happily accompany their buddies to this table. If you are not finding this to be true for you, ask your child's teacher for some help in bringing kids to the table to join your child.

One day I asked my youngest (no food allergies) where she sat at lunch that day and she said "I tried to sit with my friend at the nut-free table, but it was full." This turned out to be a common occurrence--so many kids wanted to sit with the friends who had nut allergies, that they ended up having to take turns. I know that this doesn't always happen, but most kids will not want to sit apart from their good friends and will want to join them at lunch, no matter what table it is.

An alternative to an entire nut-free table that we were provided with at our previous elementary school was an "allergy-free zone." This was an assigned seat for the kids with allergies, usually at or near the end of a table. Only kids with cafeteria lunches (nut-free) or those without nut products sat in or near this zone. Because they had ample lunchroom supervision, this worked really well for my daughter. She still got to sit with her class and friends, but she was not plopped in the middle of a group of kids eating PB & J, something she felt uncomfortable about due to the severity of her allergy.

Today, I asked a local expert -- my daughter -- what she thought about nut-free tables in elementary school and if there was anything she thought parents needed to know about them. (Since she's sat at a nut-free table or in a "nut-free zone" of the cafeteria her entire school career up until now, I hope you will agree she's probably an expert on this topic.) She brought up some good points. She told me that as long as she could bring a couple of friends to the nut-free table, she definitely preferred sitting there at lunch for peace of mind. She told me she can't really enjoy her food if she's worried about cross-contact, which can result in an accidental ingestion.

However, there have been some struggles and she emphasized to me that everyone needed to know about the table and the rules for the table. That includes all the lunchtime supervisors and the kids, too, so that everyone understood that a few friends could sit at the allergy-free table provided they had a "safe" lunch and that the table would be reserved "allergy-table" use only. (A sign on the table itself proved helpful in this case.)

No one should be forced to sit at a specific table and every parent and child will have to make the decision about what seating option works the best for them and their situation. Work with your school to find the best solution. Based on our family's experience with the "nut-free" table, I've found that like most things in life, this table is what you make of it. If you view it as a safe place for a child to eat lunch and a way to reduce allergy risk so that they can get on with their school day, there is a good chance your child just might view it positively as well.

Back to School with Food Allergies: Taking that Leap of Faith

Since my daughter with severe food allergies is beginning middle school this year, I've been quite nostalgic lately thinking back to her first day of kindergarten and what that was like for us. In a word: scary. Let me explain.

The year before kindergarten, my daughter experienced her first anaphylactic reaction to a peanut butter sandwich. Then she was diagnosed with a tree nut allergy. A few months later, she started experiencing asthma due to seasonal allergies. It felt like a triple threat, and a lot to absorb.

 At the time my daughter first entered school, I felt like I still had a lot of unanswered questions and unknowns that I was facing. I had been fortunate to find a nut-free preschool for her to attend, but elementary school was an entirely new world. It was a place where many of her allergens would be present each day, in one way or another.

Once you start heading down the slippery slope of "what ifs?" you can find yourself in for some serious stress. For example, I wondered if my daughter was going to be exposed to constant allergy triggers and possible reactions. I wondered: How much allergen in the environment would be too much? Then I started projecting into the future: As her school career went on, would she be able to participate in birthday parties, extracurricular activities and play dates? Would her school life be a happy one or one filled with allergic reactions and stress? Would today be the day I get "the call" telling me there was a reaction?

I look at old pictures of my daughter back in kindergarten and I think to myself: How did I let that little face out of my sight? She looks so small, so vulnerable, especially when I look at her now, so grown-up and poised.  I imagine that many of you are thinking similar things about your kids, as you send them off to school carrying backpacks that are nearly bigger than they are. It's not easy to hand over care of your child to others when they deal with serious food allergies, especially when they are very young.

This is one reason why I believe so strongly in teaching kids to be their own best advocates. As parents, we do our best to be informed about everything, but sometimes that is impossible. If you teach your child to question foods and refuse anything that isn't approved by you, that is a huge step in keeping them safe. Of course you must work with the school, too--that's absolutely crucial. However, teaching kids to stand up for themselves and self-manage can never begin too early in my opinion. I've found that this approach has definitely helped my daughter throughout elementary school.

And now comes the really hard part. Once we've taken care of our must-haves for school (like our medical forms, formal written health plans for our kids, communication with school staff and the like), then what?

Eventually, there comes a time to do the most uncomfortable thing of all -- taking that leap of faith that you have taught your kids well, communicated with your school and that it will be OK. It can feel like a very scary leap. In fact, I still feel like I take "the leap" each year and we've been dealing with this for 8 years. Don't beat yourself up if you feel uncertain or unsure. But if you know you've taken all the safety steps you can, it's good to feel happy and excited for your kids, too.

I wish all of you the very best for a wonderful school year whether your child is just beginning school, starting a new school or just starting a new grade. Let us know how it goes for you! We are all in this together.

Food Allergies and School: Resources and Links for a New School Year

My daughter, age 5, on her first day of kindergarten. She is now 12! Time flies....

For many of us, a new school year begins in August. Lots of you may be sending your child to a new school this year, or to school for the first time. Or maybe you are sending your child to a full day of school that includes a lunch period, when they haven't had that before.

No doubt about it. When dealing with food allergies, school can be stressful. We begin a new school this year, too, and of course there are always unknowns. However, I've learned a few things along the way that have helped our family. The links below provide my own blog posts and some great articles from others on how to deal with school and food allergies.

Before I give you the list of links, I think it's important to realize that your worry never completely goes away, but good preparation is key to success.

Just as you help your school to understand what is necessary to protect your child's health and you have a formal written plan (like an Individual Health Plan (IHP) or a 504), be sure you are working with your child so that they understand how to become their own best advocates.

Whether it is learning to refuse foods that haven't received your approval or simply making sure they wash or wipe their hands before eating, even little kids can learn about their allergies and help manage them  (though little ones need a lot of help from the adults, of course). My daughter's kindergarten teacher used to tell me that my daughter always questioned any foods -- even those that might have been OK previously. Your kids can learn to do this, too, and I encourage you to practice  the "when in doubt, do without" rule.

I will have more about school in future posts. For now, these links should be timely and helpful as you enjoy the rest of your summer and prepare for school.

 Nut-Free Mom's back to school posts:

Back to school with food allergies (includes several article links and a Real Simple magazine article link with my back-to-school advice)

http://nut-freemom.blogspot.com/2011/08/back-to-school-with-food-allergies.html

 

Food Allergy Emergency Action Plan with a link to a PDF

http://nut-freemom.blogspot.com/2010/07/its-food-allergy-action-plan-time.html

Information on 504 Plans (a 504 Plan is a legal document outlining care for your child while at school):

504 Plan for Food Allergies by Dr. Robert Wood, author of "Food Allergies for Dummies"

http://drrobertwood.com/504-plan-for-food-allergies.shtml

The Food Allergy Initiative's page on 504 Plans

http://www.faiusa.org/page.aspx?pid=526